I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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