Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
