How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
