Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
