i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
