is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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