Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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