so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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