im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I yelled at your uterus for you.
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