we have officially lost it.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
