Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
