Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
just tell him i said nine months
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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