i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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