question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
