you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
