...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
