If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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