Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
