Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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