if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
