ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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