You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
