I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Randomize
