mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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