Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize