Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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