You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
