508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
