found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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