Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
