Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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