it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
