if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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