its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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