Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
