i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
