he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
