I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
