Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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