sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
