S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Randomize
