video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
