Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Randomize
