Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
