Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??

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(214): View more from Texas

I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.

(972): View more from Texas

I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.

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(858): View more from California

I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them

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(478): View more from Georgia

yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"

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(502): View more from Kentucky

he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.

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(807): View more from Ontario

Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...

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