I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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