yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
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