watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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