is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
