So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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